It’s Ok To Be Sad……..

As I write this, there is a sense of sadness in the air.  Sadness for all that is lost in 2020.  Lives, jobs, graduations, (my big kid one of them, sniff sniff), get togethers and events (especially the Vermont 100 )that we all love and cherish…cancelled.  I keep telling myself to stay positive, this too shall pass, but, it’s also ok to just be…..sad.

A routine trip to the grocery store is so different from just a month ago.  Plexiglass separates you from the cashier, masked shoppers pushing carts, plucking remnants of pasta off the shelves.  Work is different. No more in person meetings, everything is virtual.  The kids are home, online classes now for the foreseeable future.  Dinner with friends, no longer an option.

Some good things have emerged.  Sunday evening zoom calls with our family who are scattered across the country,  John Krasinski’s show, Some Good News airing weekly (the last episode had me in tears, thank you to all our health care workers keeping us safe..our true heroes), more time with our boys, um, we even finished a 2,000 piece puzzle, friends making masks for others, and of course running.

Running….The one activity for me, that can chase away even the darkest of demons.  One foot in front of the other.

Guy and I decided to venture a few short miles from our house, to stay socially responsible with the Covid-19 stay at home rules. There’s a particular field that we love running through.  You are perched high up above the valley, with nothing but blue skies ahead of you.  It’s a place where you can find absolute peace.

Climbing up the trail on the other side, it’s a sugar makers heaven.  Maple tree groves on all sides of the trail.  Three deer spring into action, as they hear our feet shuffling through the fallen leaves.  The buds on the trees on the verge of opening.  As we meander down the trail, our shoes squish in the muddy puddles, and the peepers dive below, so as not to be seen.

But we smile as to say, “We’ve already heard you.”

Popping out onto a dirt road, we continue to climb.  I chuckle “Why does it seem we are always climbing?”  The sound of a babbling brook, the rocks so smoothed by the water. We run by ponds and homes that are beyond beautiful.  We run until the road becomes a four-class road, aka an ‘Ancient road’.

Ahead, we see a tiny Vermont cemetery, with a handful of headstones dating back to the early 1800’s.  We stop and pause to pay our respects.

Leaving the cemetery, we run awhile without exchanging words.  In this moment, I’m, alone with my thoughts.  I feel gratitude for my health, and the health of my family.  Running makes me feel alive, and I feel so fortunate to be able to enjoy something I love doing.

2020 will look different. Our calendars will be less full, our passports; a few less stamps, but together we will get through this.  2020 will be a time to reflect, a time to heal.

For me, I will use this time to explore trails close to home, tackle home grown adventures that spark my curiosity and spend time with the ones I love…….we got this! xo